Cat nap!?

Ironic I'm the biggest cat lover I know. Ever since I have a say in their outcome, I always said they would leave when they were good and ready. I treated Rusty for diabetes for 3 years. He lived to be 18. His sister, Chanel, lived to be 19. I buy the cat food recommended by vets. They have the run of the house. I get them toys and give them all the love and attention I can. They sleep in my bed. I let them go outside with supervision. I get them operated for their own good. If you're a cat and you end up in my house, you got it made. --------- "Well isn't this nice..." And isn't it ironic...dontcha think Who would've thought...it figures When you think everything's okay and everything's going right And life has a funny way of helping you out when You think everything's gone wrong and everything blows up In your face And isn't it ironic...dontcha think A little too ironic...and yeah I really do think... Life has a funny way of sneaking up on you Life has a funny, funny way of helping you out Helping you out!? ------- Well yesterday, after a week of being depressed. I stayed home and wanted to take today also. My boss told me I couldn't because 3 people were out today. So after trying to relax and get out of my black hole. I decided to go to bed early. I put NEO down on my bed and turned to close the last light. As I stepped forward, I felt NEO under my foot. So I lifted and pushed my foot further forward. Since it was further, I had to put it down. Well NEO was also further ahead. I stepped on him and broke his neck. I turned on the ceiling light. He was like a fish out of the water. Blood was everywhere and he was flopping every which way. I grabbed him to calm him down. He did, I saw his eyes were glazed. He slowed his breathing and I could hear him breath in his blood. He drowned on his own blood. I know it was an accident, but how can this have happened?! I would never ever hurt a cat. And here I killed one. My own!? A sweet, gentle and affectionate little guy. Rest in peace little NEO.